Reasons why it sucks to be female...

- Periods. Period.

- Can't shave our heads because it might look silly.

- Can't wander around outside topless with0ut getting arrested.

- Girls seem to get fat easier than guys.

- People automatically assume we're interested in makeup and stuff.

- 100% more chance of becoming pregnant.

- Can't wear guys clothing without being considered butch.

- Girls are generally shorter.

- Boobs get in the way sometimes.

- No chance whatsoever in becoming US president. (although being British and anti-government I really don't give a fuck about that!)

- There's too much male-chauvinism going on.

- All-male sports stuff is more popular... unless you do a really dumb sport like running.

- Girls are too bitchy.

- If you don't have at least 20 pairs of shoes, there must be something wrong with you. (I have 3 and am quite satisfied)

- Girls get drunk easier. (could be considered a good thing, but we also get TOO drunk more easily..)

- If you sleep with lots of people, you become a 'slut'. If guys do this they become some sort of 'stud'.

- People think you're less likely to be able to look after yourself.

- People automatically assume that you love watching romantic comedies.

- It looks worse if you have greasy hair.

- We have to (well, we don't have to - we just do!) remove leg hair, armpit hair and stuff.

- People assume we're evil or something if we don't call everyone 'hunni'.

- Burping and farting isn't 'ladylike'.

The list is endless, but I can't be bothered carrying it on. After writing this, I feel like getting a sex-change!

Morrissey and Cigarettes...

Eep. I impulsively bought a ticket for the O2 Wireless Festival on July 4th. Only to see Morrissey really. It's in less than a week. I'm extremely terrified though because it means going to London alone and possibly hanging round Euston or Birmingham for about 4 or 5 hours. That part wont be fun at all. I'm not even sure the actual festival will be all that fun. After all, who wants to go to a festival alone? I'm insane i tell thee! INSANE! Although it is Morrissey, therefore should be good, no matter how alone I am. I hope it'll be ok. I don't really want to get murdered or anything. It's Morrissey though. I would give my life for Morrissey. He is my God... Absolute fucking legend. I'm glad I bought the ticket even though it's going to possibly be one of the scariest nights of my life! It's all worth it! *needs to stop impulsively buying things!*

What's with cigarette packets? People who start smoking are generally old enough to know the risks! My current pack says something along the lines of 'smoking causes impotence', I don't give a fuck! I'm female FFS! ... 'Smokers die younger' THANK GOD! I don't want to live until I'm about 80, I'd rather die young! Living past the age of 40 definitely doesn't seem worth the effort... Unless of course your name is Steven Patrick Morrissey.... 'Smoking kills' - yeah, we've all heard that one, but It kills indirectly! It's the cancer or the emphysema that kills. Not the cigarettes... I'm not sure why all this angers me, but meep! lol.

Anyways, I'm off to smoke cancer sticks, talk to rodents and drink diet coke.

Another rather pointless blog.

Wow... It's rather dark tonight, much like any other night, but it feels darker for some reason. Not entirely sure why though. Oddness.
I had a rather bad hangover today. I had puke in my hair and it was vile! The hangover has gone now though. So hey ho!
I've been filling in the application form for sixth form. There's a part that says 'your interests in school', I'm not sure what to put there.. I was never really interested in school! I'm not really sure what to put in the 'your interests and hobbies out of school' either.. All I really do is sit around on the computer, drink diet coke, draw random things, listen to music and occasionally get rather wasted. I need to think of something to put that makes me sound good. I'm not exactly an A* student or anything. I really need them to let me back into school, otherwise I'll be completely screwed for another year. It's too late to apply to get back into college. Anyways, I think the subjects I'm going to choose are psychology, art, applied science and sociology.
Right now I'm listening to The Eighties Matchbox B-line Disaster and pondering what to do tonight. I might watch lots of FMA or something... I dunno.
I'm bored of writing this now, so hooble toodle doo!

Irritating degu antics and whatnot.

My degus officially hate me. I just spent 3 - 4 hours trying to get them back in their cage. They were chewing up everything I own. They broke the only thing I have that'll charge my ipod. Not only were they wrecking things and stuff, but they were taunting me too. They knew I wanted them back in the cage, and Morrissey decided to keep crawling onto my lap or shoulder, letting me stroke him a bit and running away. Miyavi kept wandering across my laptop too. It was really quite amusing in a very annoying, frustrating kind of way. Thank fuck they're back in there though. If they were out of the cage for much longer it would have driven me even more insane than I already am. lol.

The hoobs is on in half an hour. I don't think I'm going to watch it though. I might, it's just I want to go for a swim in the lake at about 9am. I could get a couple of hours sleep. Alternatively, I could stay awake and guarantee I will be awake at 9... I need the exercise. I think I'll get changed into the clothes I'm going to wear at the lake now and have a short nap.. possibly downstairs so I'll get disturbed enough when people wake up. Meep.

Ooohhh.. I got the grandmother to phone school. They're going to send me a sixth form application form and stuff, so I might actually have something to do in september! YAYYY!! =]

Anyways, I'm off to get ready for the lake and stuff.

Hoobletoodledoooooo!

the bus

It feels like I'm on a bus, both literally and metaphorically (although the literal bit is only because I'm cold and listening to my ipod).

The bus is going nowhere in particular and I'm not sure where I want to get off. I know I want to get off though. The bus keeps going over random bump things in the road and it's windy so the bus keeps rocking slightly from side to side. It's a double decker. I'm sitting at the front at the top. I can see what is in front of me. I don't like what I see. I want it to stop going forward and reverse instead. I want it to reverse to last year, maybe the year before.. or maybe even reverse back to just over 17 years ago. I'm alone on the bus, although there are many other passengers.
The other passengers keep looking at me. It's almost like they're consciously tempting me to kill them all and jump out into the road. Everything on the bus is terrifying me. The sound of the engine, people moving, the smell of the sandwich the woman behind me is eating. But still, I need to act like a normal person. So I sit here, listening to Morrissey, Radiohead, Anthrax. I look around, I do a spot of people-watching - why can't I be like them? They don't seem confused, scared and anxious. They're normal. Unlike me.
Nine Inch Nails, Nirvana, The Dresden Dolls. My Ipod is still playing. Giving me the much needed barrier between myself and the rest of the bus. The bus doesn't feel real, the passengers don't feel real and I don't feel real. What is reality? I ask myself... No reply. There never is. I never know what to say. I never know what to do. I just *am*. I don't need to do or say anything on this bus anyway, apart from press the big red button when it's time to get off.
My hair is greasy, I haven't brushed my teeth and I look like a hobo. I don't care though. I don't know these people and they don't know me. Inspiral Carpets, Placebo. I'm barely noticing the music that's playing, but it's the only thing I have to focus on. The only thing to keep me grounded. Can't exactly be 'grounded' at the top of a double-decker though, can I?
The bus doesn't feel clean. I try not to touch the wall, or the seats. I try to breathe as little as possible so I don't breathe in the germs. It's so dirty. Unhygienic. Vile. Rather sickening. I can feel the germs all over me. I can even see them if I concentrate hard enough. I don't like it at all.
Slipknot, Muse, The Beatles. The playlist seems never ending, like the bus journey. Most of the songs on the playlist are rather depressing, like the bus journey. The playlist and the journey seem to mirror eachother a worrying amount.
The bus is getting more and more crowded and I'm starting to suffocate. I'm getting more and more anxious. I want to hide from everything and everyone. I already look quite inconspicuous sitting here with my hood up and listening to music. I'm sure if I disappeared nobody would notice. I keep thinking. Too much... or maybe too little. The worst thing about buses, is that you have too much time to think.

My mind completely empties, I can't think properly, but suddenly I decide I need to get off.

beachy, campingy, party thingy

The weekend was rather good!

(I did a more pictureyfied blog about it here...)

Got suitably intoxicated and didn't have a hangover! =] ... was rather surprised at the lack of hangover though!

We went to the beach and on the way there I was attacked by a tree! ... and people were jumping off high dune things... and I filled a big WKD bottle with sand and James fell down a hill!

I remember a small group of us in my tent, trying to keep the vodka as secret as possible! It was rather amusing!... and probably kind of obvious as we were sitting in a circle passing round a thing of cranberry juice!

And I remember going to near a tree to secretly drink the rest of the vodka when the cranberry juiceified stuff had ran out..

Ooohh.. and there was the usual everyone going with everyone thing..

And I remember my lip bar coming out loads..

And then I don't remember much until about 4am when me and Ben were laughing at Dyl sneezing and the fact that he picked a really weird time to put down his tent!

Then when most people had left, Me, Dyl and Michelle hung out on the beach all morning and had quite a laugh talking about what any normal person would find utterly disturbing!

And I still have half a beach and half a forest in my hair...

That will be all!

=]

mooo

Right.. so I bleached my hair today and I'm now very very blond... but it really really irritated my scalp ... I always thought patch test things were a waste of time, but today I found out that I was really, really wrong! XD... Not only did I not do a patch test, but I neglected to see the importance of the gloves that come in the box... So I burnt my fingers (which still really fucking hurt) AND my scalp!... Yes, I'm stupid.... aaannnddd that's not the worst of it! .. I overly bleached the bits of my hair that were already rather blonde and it kind of...disintegrated.. So I now have shorter hair! lol... I don't mind though, in fact, I'm pretty fucking amused by the whole thing!

Anyway, on Friday there's a party thing at the beach/forest again =] .. I can't wait! .. I haven't seen people for ages!

I'm gonna go to my mums house tomorrow/when I wake up, to get some of my stuff .. I can't wait to see the cats! =]

I can't be bothered writing any more lol.

new hamster and stuff..

Yesterday I impulsively bought a hamster. He is so cute. He's called Jarvis Wolfgang Stardust (or just jarvis...) Being in my bedroom is kind of like being in some sort of rodent sanctuary..

Yesterday was once again rather random. Walked round Bangor with toy swords and Herbie the monkey (who i spent 6 quid on trousers for =/)... I think I need to stop impulsively spending my money =/ I had about £80 at the start of the week.. I seem to have spent it all in the last 2 days!

I've now set myself a challenge not to spend any money unnecessarily for a whole month. It's going to be hard but it needs to be done!

*will possibly elaborate on this shizz later*

Yet another pointless entry...

Odd... I just went out for a fag and came back indoors to find the grandfather awake. It was half 5 in the morning ffs! I'm usually the only person awake at this time.

Anyways... Yesterday was fun but random... Hung out with the Dyl and played battleships on the steps on the clock thing in the middle of Bangor! .. and bought loads of random crap. I also realized I want some piranhas! They rule, but I cant have them in my room because the degus might fall into the water or something... The grandmother wont let me have them anywhere else in the house either and my mum is a bitch when it comes to pets and stuff :(

Ooohhh.. I officially have boys underwear! ... Doctor Who underwear (age 13-14 to be precise). So yeah... I have David Tennant in inappropriate places! XD

Right now I'm listening to Michael Jackson, waiting for The Hoobs to come on and munching raisins.

I had a driving lesson yesterday and I did harder stuff than before. It was awesome! I went along the A55... 70mph =] .. and I realised that driving is a vaguely great stress-reliever! Driving is fun. I cant wait until I pass my test and shizz.

I've had Bohemian Rhapsody stuck in my head for almost 24 hours now! I can't get it out of my head. I like the song, but my head could have picked a better and less depressing Queen song!

Anyways... I must dash and feed Morrissey and Miyavi.

shizzle..init

Hehe, the Degus have a new wheel. They absohoobilutely love it! It was rather funny earlier. Miyavi decided to climb inside my hoodie to distract me whilst Morrissey went to explore under my bed. It was so cute because it was like team work and degus are adorable anyway. *ponders* Wow.. I love my degus more than ever today (if that's possible!).

My sleep pattern is still absolutely fucked. I woke up approximately an hour ago, after 4.5 hours sleep (which is rather good for me).

At about 8am I went to the lake... It was fucking freezing! I swam fully clothed (jeans with a shirt and a tie for extra sophistication). It was rather fun... Although, here's a tip - Never try and do up a belt whilst treading water!.. It's rather difficult! (although in an emergency it does work!) Gosh.. I love swimming. The worst part of swimming is always getting in though! I spent more time getting into the lake than swimming in it! It was icy cold! It also motivated me to wash my hair for the first time in ages, as my twizzletuft seemed to contain half the contents of the lake.

My Hoobyforum is back =]. It was dead for a few days, then it wasn't letting new users register. All is hooby groovy now though!

I can't stop listening to The Dresden Dolls at the moment. In the last few months I have become gradually more obsessed. I've been into them for a few years, but I never anticipated becoming obsessed to this extent. Their work is pure genius...and I'm slightly in love with Amanda Palmer! (possibly to the same extent as Helena Bonham Carter!) Last week (or whenever No, Virginia came out) I was really shocked to discover that HMV didn't sell it! I had to buy it from COB records. HMV should be thoroughly ashamed of themselves!

Right now I look a state! I'm wearing really old, grey trousers, my spy mission top (age 9-10 from the kids section of sainsburys!), my slipknot hoodie (which I've had since I was 10 and is still too big for me!) and my twizzletuft is all... fluffy and whatnot.

Might edit this on the other laptop later on and add photos and shizzle.

*has now added a photo* ... and wow I have so many drafts that I haven't actually posted! lol

Hooble-toodle-doo!

...

=[ My middle finger and my pointy finger hurt. I just jammed them in the door. Twas rather painful.

I had this idea. I'd fix things by going out on a meaningless, pointless mission to do something or have some sort of revelation. So I got out my night vision goggles (because, well, what mission is complete without them?!), put on a plain black top and a black bandanna (so I blend in more with the darkness) and I was ready to leave. I then had a sudden realization that it was pointless to go on a mission with no actual purpose, so I sat down, utterly bewildered at my own stupidity.
I am now sitting on the sofa pondering. It's sunday night/monday morning so nowhere will be open. Shame really. I seem to have ran out of cigarettes.

Today has been bizarre. I think I managed to vaguely quit the game and replace it with the game of life. Funny how those two games are so similar. Although it could be argued that the game in question shouldn't really be counted as a game, just an oddity I somehow managed to sub-consciously create. Shit. I just lost the game because I'm writing about two games... now three! ... Confused? I don't blame you!

(about 5 hours later)

I'm watching my Die Hard dvd. Although I'm a girl, I want to be John McClane. I do not find him attractive. He is just a pure fucking legend. Yippee ki-yay motherfucker!

The one thing that really bugs me about Die Hard is Alan Rickmans accent in it. Alan Rickman usually talks really awesomely (especially in Harry Potter and Sweeney Todd) but in this it's ridiculous. He's still a legend though. Although in Die Hard nobody beats McClane!

Meep.