Deadrelativesblog.

I actually had a conversation with my grandfather earlier. Usually we don't speak to eachother unless we are arguing. We did argue a little bit, but only about what fifteen plus eighteen equals... It's thirty-three, right? Please say it is... I hate being wrong! I don't think I've ever spoken to him for more than about a minute (apart from when I was really little). It was actually quite interesting. I learnt a lot of random facts about dead family members and family people I've never met.

Apparently I had a great, great aunt Fanny. She died wayyy before I was born, but I found this fact hilarious. Ooohh, maybe she was reincarnated as my fish, Fanny. *ponders* I think I'll ask Fanny about it... I wonder whether or not she'll answer... I bet she will. I just wont be able to hear her because she lives in the water so her voice will be all muffled and fish-like.

My grandfather's uncle died because of a cup of tea... Well, not directly because of a cup of tea (it was more because of heavy, victorian furniture and his father being lazy), but if this cup of tea hadn't existed, he wouldn't have died when he did. Death by panad... What a way to die! I think my granfather's father (the tea drinker) was ever so slightly guilty of manslaughter.

I found out that many of my relatives kept bees. I don't know why that interested me, I just thought it was quite random and interesting.

His brother (who either used to keep bees or still keeps bees) has a glass eye. Apparently, he didn't even know he was blind in one eye until some army doctory dude told him when he was going to do national service or whatever... It amazes me how someone couldn't know they were like 50% blind! I haven't seen him since I was about six and I don't remember him at all... but for some reason I have a memory of a dude with a glass eye that I thought was another one of his brothers (who died a couple of years ago) who I have met quite a few times. He apparently had almost perfect vision... So I'm all confused because I think a memory that isn't even a memory because I don't remember it has got all muddled up with a proper memory. Heh, I think I'm sort of making sense! :P

I think I might have offended him a little when I compared his mother and father's relationship with if I was to go out with a three year old or a thirty-three year old. I was all like 'dude... that is sick and paedoey'. He seemed more amused than offended though... I think... I'm not very good at reading people. I hope he was more amused than offended. I was joking... Kind of.

Heh, yeahh... This blog post is probably very boring to people who aren't related to me, but I found all this stuff interesting and had to blog about it, so sorry if I have bored you to death! XD

R.I.P. Maisy. =[

R.I.P Maisy.
March 2009 - October 2009.
<3

There was a phone call at nine o clock this morning. It was the vet to say Maisy had died during the night. They had tried their best to save her and there was apparently someone with her most of the night.

When she came home from the vets, she was wrapped in a tissuey thing. I know it sounds stupid, but I thought she deserved to be wrapped in some proper fabric. I'm glad I decided to change what she was wrapped in. It makes me feel a little better now that I've seen her body. It was a chance to say goodbye. I stroked her for about 10 minutes. She still looked beautiful even though she was dead.

Her body was all sprawled out, but she looked kind of peaceful. One of her eyes looked like it was stuck together with blood. The other just looked like she was sleeping. I wrapped her up with the sleeping eye facing upwards. Her body was very, very cold and stiff. For some reason her ears weren't. Apart from her being dead, she was the same old Maisy. When I was wrapping her up in the black fabric, it was really difficult to wrap up her head. It felt wrong. Eventually I managed to force myself to wrap up her whole body. I put her in a little box with birds and stuff on it.

I put a load of sunflower seeds in the box. Maisy liked sunflower seeds. I also wrote her a letter. I bought a plant pot and put some chrysanthenums and cyclomen in it. I also planted some dwarf iris bulbs too and hopefully they should grow in the spring. Maisy is buried in the box inside the soil. We had a little funeral for her.

I'm going to print off a photo of her or something and make some form of memorial thing with her name and stuff on it to put in the pot.

I'm going to really miss her. She was an awesome gerbil. She always used to jump straight into my hand and she liked to climb inside my clothes. She really shouldn't have died this young. =[

Stuff and stuff.

After spending from midnight until whenever I fell asleep completely freaking out about spiders, I woke up to find that a) a whole pack of chocolate digestives was now empty and b) I really, quite desperately needed to pee.

I very jumpily (not jumpy in a boing kinda way, more of a fuckisthatblackbitonthewallaspider kinda way) made my way to the toilet (quite an achievement considering a few hours ago I couldn't leave my room) and urinated. It was one of the best pees of my life because I had been holding it in since I saw the spider.

I'm not sure what happened to the chocolate digestives... The pack was definitely full earlier and I'm sure it can't have been the dog because it was closed with a pretty good knot and stuff... I don't think dogs can untie knots... I must have eaten them in my sleep.

I cautiously made my way back to my bedroom and gave Morrissey his medicine (an hour earlier than I was going to because I wanted to go back to sleep). Instead of going back to sleep I ended up realising I was awake and writing this. Currently Morrissey and Miyavi are cleaning eachother or something and it's adorable. I wish I had my camera to make a video of it!

Morrissey terrified me last night. I honestly thought he had died for a few minutes. He didn't appear to be breathing and he was staying very still. I opened the cage door and he still didn't move. In the state of freaked outishness I was already in, I was all like 'Fuck' and shouted to my grandmother that Morrissey was dead. She came out of her room and I think she was really sad about him dying. She asked if I was sure he was dead so I poked him. He glared at me and kind of licked my finger. I felt stupid. Now I'm really scared of him dying. Meep. I think he's getting a bit better though.

The spider was big and on the wall. It was horrible. Nobody else could find it (I'm sure they didn't even believe me about it), so I barricaded myself in my room. Tears streaming down my face (yes, I actually cried o_O), I sat in my room for hours just freaking 0ut and whatnot. I remember getting harder and harder to breathe and I made a pact with myself never to leave my room because all escape routes had potential spiders. In the event of a spider actually being in my room, my plan was to somehow break the window and climbb down the front of the house. Stupid, much? I'm so glad I fell asleep. If I hadn't, I'd still be freaking out now. Horrible, horrible night.

Yesterday was cool though. I made bread using this recipe. It tasted pretty good and it was great to pretend it was someone I didn't like whilst beating the crap out of it. I got told that I would kill the yeast by stabbing it and that it would also die when I cooked it. I proceeded to cry about it (heh, I think I was slightly hormonal or something yesterday- I hardly ever cry)! All I could think was 'poor yeast'. Luckily, I soon got over my yeast sympathy. I think I'm going to start baking more stuff again.

I'm going to stop writing this now.

Morrissey and Cigarettes...

Eep. I impulsively bought a ticket for the O2 Wireless Festival on July 4th. Only to see Morrissey really. It's in less than a week. I'm extremely terrified though because it means going to London alone and possibly hanging round Euston or Birmingham for about 4 or 5 hours. That part wont be fun at all. I'm not even sure the actual festival will be all that fun. After all, who wants to go to a festival alone? I'm insane i tell thee! INSANE! Although it is Morrissey, therefore should be good, no matter how alone I am. I hope it'll be ok. I don't really want to get murdered or anything. It's Morrissey though. I would give my life for Morrissey. He is my God... Absolute fucking legend. I'm glad I bought the ticket even though it's going to possibly be one of the scariest nights of my life! It's all worth it! *needs to stop impulsively buying things!*

What's with cigarette packets? People who start smoking are generally old enough to know the risks! My current pack says something along the lines of 'smoking causes impotence', I don't give a fuck! I'm female FFS! ... 'Smokers die younger' THANK GOD! I don't want to live until I'm about 80, I'd rather die young! Living past the age of 40 definitely doesn't seem worth the effort... Unless of course your name is Steven Patrick Morrissey.... 'Smoking kills' - yeah, we've all heard that one, but It kills indirectly! It's the cancer or the emphysema that kills. Not the cigarettes... I'm not sure why all this angers me, but meep! lol.

Anyways, I'm off to smoke cancer sticks, talk to rodents and drink diet coke.