ch, ch, ch, ch, changes...

It's weird how much life can change in a year. This time last year, I'd never even thought about having a baby. In fact, I was 99.9% certain I didn't want to ever have a baby. Shit happened, I got pregnant and POW- I have the most awesome squigglytiddlypeep in the world and wouldn't do anything to change that even if I had a time machine. A year ago I actually disliked babies. Now that I have Isaac, I'm obsessed! It's so fucking weird lol!

A year ago I was in sixth form and yeah, I'd thought many times about quitting... but I was determined to stick at it until I actually got a-levels, especially since I'd quit college the previous year and already failed at it once. I somehow ended up quitting that. It was kind of accidental (in a kind of 'blahh- I'll go to school tomorrow' kind of way), but I'm happy I did. I'd hate to have to leave Isaac all day every day to do school stuff! It would have been awful being the only pregnant looking person in school. I have the rest of my life to do educationy shizz. I plan to be in uni by I'm 25. Knowing me, it probably wont happen, but hey ho!

A year ago I lived with my grandparents (in fact, a month ago I did) but now I live in a pretty awesome 'flat' thing with Ikeydoodle and it couldn't be any awesomer. I love not having to share a bathroom with other people. Yeah, even though I don't have people telling me what to do all the time, I'm still not free to do whatever I want whenever I want to do it because my life revolves around Ike, but I don't mind.

A year ago I saw my friends pretty much every day. Now that most of them have toddled off to uni in far away places, I hardly ever see them anymore. I've become kind of like a loner with a baby, but it's cool... It means I actually look forward to seeing friends rather than just socialising because it's something that happens a lot.

A year ago I had quite a lot of piercings. Currently I only have my tongue piercing and nose piercing in (still have other holes in my face, but they have nothing in them). My beloved bridge piercing closed up because they made me take it out in the hospital when I was getting all sewn up after having Isaac and I ended up forgetting to put it back in. The day I realised I couldn't put it back in was a terrible one. I'd had that piercing since before I did my GCSEs and it had become a part of my face. I barely recognise myself now. I'm going to rectify the lack of piercings some time soon. I can't believe it's been over a year since I got any piercings or tattoos. Soon that will all change again.

A year ago I was vegan. Now I'm just your average vegetarian. I only changed that because I was pregnant and couldn't be bothered with a dietician dictating to me what I should eat. I'm not 100% sure why I'm still un-vegan. I still have all the same views on shizz like this. I plan to reveganise myself some time soon. Maybe January 1st? Seems like a good time to me... I might just make it a gradual thing though. I didn't do that the first time round. It seems like a good idea.

I was even a completely different person a year ago. I'm not sure what's changed about my actual personality. I can't put my finger on it. I still like most of the same stuff and whatnot, so I can't have changed too much... Maybe it's because I've grown up or something (which I swore would never happen >.< ).

But yeah... My point is a fuckload of stuff has changed in the last year... The changes I've written about here make it look like a lot has changed, but I haven't even written about everything that's changed... So it really is a rather huge amount of changeyness!

=]

Sensibleness!

I know this is probably pretty obvious stuff to most people... but I feel rather clever for thinking of it. It'll probably end up saving me a lot of money!

Instead of typing stuff like this whilst online, if I type it all offline (like I am currently doing) and only go online to actually post it, I'll be using up a lot less time and shizz on my mobile broadbandy thingy and hopefully I'll have to top it up less often.

A lot of time I spend on the internet (apart from when I'm on facebook, twitter or various forums) just involes reading random crap... So if I open a page that has a lot of stuff I wanna read on it, I'll just disconnect for the amount of time it takes to read it all. Clever, innit! =D

Sometimes if Isaac is whingey, the only thing I have found that will actually calm him down is playing him the video of Common People by Pulp (yes, I have a fucking awesome baby!)... So I now have the video (on youtube) constantly open in a tab, so whenever he gets whingey I can play it straight away without having to go online.

So yes, as a person who is used to being online pretty much constantly and never going offline, I'm pretty impressed with myself! XD

I'm also pretty impressed with myself because I've been washing things quite soon after using them. I've also constantly had at least three super-clean bottles in the steriliser, so he hasn't had to wait long if he wants a bottle and I haven't prepared one... I even have an emergency supply of ready-made milky shizz in the cupboard in case I don't have time to boil water, let it cool down and mix the powder stuff into it. I'm so fucking organized! The flat is messy, but stuff is clean. I've managed to go through a whole bottle of dettol since last night. I even made myself food last night. Yeah, it tasted like shite (twas cheap asda macaroni cheese shizz that I probably cooked wrong) and I didn't eat all of it because it was gross, but I still made it!

Last night was my first full night alone in the flat with Isaac. We had a half-night here last week, but we ended up going to my grandparents house in the middle of the night because Isaac was crying a lot and wouldn't shut up and I didn't know what to do with him (turned out he was constipated). We then spent two nights here when my mother decided to stay with us. I think I coped pretty well with him last night. Yeah, I'm pretty sure there's still a dirty nappy (peed not pooped) on my bedroom floor and Isaac is wearing a terrible looking outfit (because I couldn't figure out how to put his dungarees on him), but he's still alive! He seems pretty happy and stuff. He's asleep now, so I can tidy up and whatnot... Maybe I'll make lunch or something.

Heh, it feels so weird having to look after both myself and another human and also having to clean things and be all grown up! XD

Dreamishness.

It's been a while since I blogged. I haven't really had the time. In the last month, my life has been particularly hectic with having a baby and stuff. I'm not complaining though- Isaac is hoobygroovy! He's currently asleep on me. I've also been gradually moving into my 'flat'. It now has a fridge, so it's very liveable in. It still lacks a bed though.

Last night I had a very weird dream. It was raining heavy footballs. I was in an odd building thing. I think it was supposed to be a school or something... but it was more like Hogwarts than the school I used to go to. The building was absolutely destroyed by the balls and a load of people were killed. Later on in the dream, I was shopping for Christmas cards and slightly infuriated at the amount of Winnie The Pooh cards and the lack of interesting cards. It wasn't the most interesting dream I've ever had, but I'm sure it was the only dream I've had for a few weeks. I'm usually pretty good with remembering dreams, but I haven't had one for so long that this seemed like a novelty.

Apparently I was talking in my sleep lastnight too. I haven't had any reports of that happening for a while either. It was probably because I had an Isaacless night as the grandmother was looking after him for a change. With a baby, sleep seems to happen even less than it used to... Well, not ages ago... but when I was pregnant, I'd started sleeping a lot more than I have done for many years and I kinda got used to it. Although it might just have been because I was inebriated when I went to sleep (for the first time in like 8 or 9 months or something) and it put me into a deeper sleep than I would usually have. Either way, it was fucking great to actually have a dream. I've missed them.

Might blog again some time soonish, whenever Isaac is asleep and I have nothing better to do.